2007 – His Majesty’s Theatre

‘Fabulously funny, outstanding’

– Press and Journal

‘If you have a ticket – hold on to it tightly… you’ll love every hilarious minute.’

– Evening Express

‘A week at HMT’ – the fantastical ambition first voiced in the Lemon Tree bar after our first show became a reality in 2007 with ‘Desperate Fishwives’. A small preview tour (or ‘Tourette’) took the nascent production to the good people of Aboyne and Laurencekirk, raising funds for local good causes and providing the cast with a couple of slap-up home-baked post-show feeds. It was all new stuff, bringing Minker TV Gold and the Planning Officer to the stage for the first time. Not to forget Mither and Faither’s coach trip to Paris and our requiem for Grampian TV.

Gallery

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A live recording of ‘Desperate Fishwives” is available on CD from the Flying Pig Shoppie.

Cast
John Hardie
Moray Barber
Craig Pike
Susan Gordon
Steve Rance
Elaine Clark
Greg Gordon

Script
Greg Gordon

Lyrics
John Hardie   Moray Barber

Directed by
John Hardie

Musical Arrangements
Steve Rance

Sponsors
Sparrows Offshore
Ledingham Chalmers
KR Steel Services Ltd
Esslemonts
Gavin Bain and Co
The Marcliffe Hotel
CMS Cameron MCKenna

What the Papers Said
Press and Journal 8/3/07

DESPERATE FISHWIVES PROVES A BRILLIANT CATCH

There was a time when the comedians calling themselves the Flying Pigs performed in the smaller, less grandiose venues of Aberdeen. In the early days of the performers’ career they found time for humble critics and would of occasion even write my review for me and print it in the programme. Now of course the Flying Pigs are in a different orbit and packing out HM Theatre to the ceiling every night until Saturday this week and I have to write my own review of their fabulously funny, outstanding show Desperate Fishwives. Still it’s the least I can do in exchange for a fantastic laugh. I’ve said this before but it seems even truer now – the Pigs have grown into the realms of HMT, they are the inheritors of ‘Scotland the What?’, in more ways than one since John Hardie, one of the principal Pigs, is Buff Hardie’s son. Now I’ve made the comparison you’ll know what the Flying Pigs are all about. Basically about helping North-east folk laugh at themselves. In a sense last night’s audience were onstage in the many, colourful, daft and couthy characters written mainly by Greg Gordon. Poor Torry gets a ribbing, as usual, but then so does Milltimber. Even the programme is a hoot. The show runs until Saturday and should not be missed.

Evening Express 8/3/07

FLYING PIGS KEEP THE LAUGHS COMING

Laughs were flying last night, as the Pigs played their first night at His Majesty’s Theatre to a sell-out crowd.This, the group’s 10th show, sees them back at HMT for the second time in as many years, playing to full houses for five nights. Quite a jump from their humble beginnings, when in 1998, their first show Last Tango in Powis played two nights at the Lemon Tree. Now, they’re exactly where they were headed, with a show which has snowballed in popularity but remains the same blend of irreverent songs, skits and hilarious characters guaranteed to have you in stitches. Often likened to Scotland The What? for a new generation, the group certainly comes from the same comedy stable. John Hardie (yes, Buff’s son) and Craig Pike share some of the show’s funniest moments on a pink park bench, with the musings of instantly familiar old boys Archie and Davie.Meanwhile Susan Gordon and Craig Pike take their well-loved characters Mither and Faither on a coach to Paris – accompanied by a troublesome prostrate and a pair of unwanted friends. With Greg Gordon’s Andy, the jobsworth jannie, sharing the laughs with Craig Pike at the council planning department lamenting the building of the Kepplestone flats, Desperate Fishwives goes where most of us fear to tread – and emerges laughing. If you have a ticket – hold on to it tightly. As ever, you’ll love every hilarious minute.

Previous show: The Seagull Has Landed – 2005

Next show: How To Look Good Glaikit – 2009

2001 – Aberdeen Arts Centre

“Like watching a home game in which the whole team scores, even the keeper.”

—Press & Journal

‘Scotland the What?’, the next generation.”

—Press & Journal

Alan Franchi’s kind invitation to headline the first Aberdeen Arts Centre Comedy Festival with a “Best Of” show took us by surprise. We’d known we were going to have to replace Laura Sinclair, who was off to drama school, but we didn’t realise we’d have to do it within a couple of months, for our biggest show to date. So we were very pleased to welcome Elaine Clark to the team, just in time for the move from our compact and bijou home at the Lemon Tree to a venue more than twice the size. Ever positive and forwards-looking, we hypothesised (and fretted) that :

A larger venue + material the punters have heard before =

Loss of intimacy + audience ennui =

Nae b*gger laughing.

We needn’t have worried; the laugh which greeted Archie and Davie’s reminiscences of Gothenburg 1983 nearly blew John and Pikey’s flat caps off, and Oli’s impassioned impression of Chewbacca singing the works of Barbara Dickson almost hospitalised one loyal fan, which is always nice.

We also recorded our first CD, now sadly sold out. Sadly for anyone who wants one. Happily, though, for Andrew’s folks who finally regained full use of their loft in 2008.

Cast
John Hardie
Oli Knox
Craig Pike
Steve Rance
Elaine Clark
Susan Webster

Written by
Greg Gordon
Andrew Brebner

Directed by
John Hardie
Musical Arrangements
Steve Rance
Craig Pike

Sponsors

Town & County
The Press and Journal
Gardner Accountants

What the Papers Said

Aberdeen Press & Journal 20/10/01

The Aberdeen Arts Centre was packed last night for Flying Pig – Prime Cuts and rightly so. Born from Students’ Charities Shows, Flying Pig is in one sense Scotland The What?, The Next Generation, with John Hardie, Craig Pike Oliver Knox and Susan Webster magnificently taking the lead roles. In other words, if you’re from the North-east an evening with Flying Pig is like watching a home game in which the whole team scores, even the keeper. Exploiting local scenes and characters and giving them a distinctly surreal twist is Flying Pig’s secret. The sharpness of the writing and the power of the performances, however, raises it far above its Student Show origins. The laughter rocked the Arts Centre last night as one hilarious sketch followed another. Basically a greatest hits collection, this all too rare appearance of the Flying Pigs is not to be missed. They fly again at the Arts Centre tonight and cannot be recommended enough.

Previous show: All Quiet On The Westburn Front – 2001

Next Show: The Madness Of Kingswells – 2002

Lemon Tree Studio – 2000

“Sharp, witty, irreverent and essential comedy viewing”

– Press & Journal

“H’min, wis you in ‘at show at i Lemon Tree?
F*@#!ng brilliant! I hinna laughed ‘at much in years!”

—The Bouncer at Beluga

Dedicated to the memory of Stanley Cooslick, the famously reclusive North-East auteur, Clockwork Sporran had been unseen in British theatres for over 20 years, primarily because we’d only just written it.

Highlights included the Teuchtervision Song contest, Robbie Shepherd appearing in a Jane Austen novel,  Craig vamping it up and Maurice blowing his own, not inconsiderable, trumpet. .

More full houses and good notices resulted, for which we can only apologise, as a reversal of fortune would clearly have made for more exciting reading.

The post-show party was at Greg’s city centre batchelor pad, with newly fitted kitchen, leather suite and perforated roof. We were also graced with a guest appearance from Oli’s parents, the Commander and Mrs Knox, who provided words of wisdom and encouragement, as well as a reprimand for John for eating stovies straight out of the pan.

Cast
Shirley Cummings
John Hardie
Oli Knox
Craig Pike
Steven Rance
Susan Webster

Written by
Greg Gordon
Andrew Brebner

Directed by
John Hardie

Lighting Design by
Kelvin Murray

Sponsors
Raeburn Christie
Lefevre Litigation

What the Papers Said

Aberdeen Press & Journal 4/6/99

Pigs were flying again at the Lemon Tree last night, powered by hail and hearty laughter from an enthusiastic audience. The long-awaited Flying Pig production of Stanley Cooslick’s Clockwork Sporran was unleashed with a distinctly tangy, orange flavour, right down to MC John Hardie’s boots. Although not sponsored by Orange, the show featured a flock of welcome mobile phone jokes, and some lively stabs at Grampian TV. However, the flying piglets are in no way discriminating about their vicitms, most people from most walks of life in the North-east, including myself, gets comically abused in this hilarious show. The Aberdeen Pavement Dances were a personal favourite and although all the piglets were uniformly brilliant, Craig Pike was more brilliant that most – in his orange shirt and socks. Written by Greg Gordon and Andrew Brebner, Clockwork Sporran is sharp, witty, irreverent, and essential comedy viewing.

Aberdeen Evening Express, 4/6/99

Jings, crivvens, help ma Boab! How do they do it? Another evening of pure unadulterated fun from the Flying Pigs – only this time, it may be even better. If you consider yourself an old-timer – if you have performances of Last Tango In Powis and Where Seagulls Dare under your belt – you’d better make it a hat-trick with this latest contribution to the North-east laughter file. Craig Pike excels himself yet again in a multitude of acting and musical roles, including a Doric Count Dracula and long-suffering faither in the Mither! sketches. John Hardie never fails to entertain in roles from the hilarious Archie and Davie and The Liar, to an uncanny impersonation of Grampian TV’s Kate Fraser. The show also launches some pop careers in the form of arthritic geriatric Betty Spears and the North-east boy band, Portsoyzone. The cast of A Clockwork Sporran, which includes the brilliant Susan Webster, Shirley Cummings, Steve Rance and Oli Knox, should be proud of themselves. For the third year running, I’ve chuckled all the way home. Catch it if you can.”

Previous show: Where Seagulls Dare – 1999

Next show: All Quiet On The Westburn Front – 2001

Lemon Tree Studio – 1998

“A banquet of belly-laughs.. superbly performed..if you can get a ticket for it, you’ll be very lucky.”

—Press & Journal

“Weel, it wiz different.”

— Craig’s Dad

Anticipation (coupled with anxiety, leavened with a touch of raw fear) was the watchword as The Flying Pigs taxied down the runway for the first time. As a new company performing new material in an unfamiliar theatre, we really had no idea what to expect. This didn’t make it easy to sell tickets.

Us –            “Will you buy a ticket?”

Punter –    “What can I expect?”

Us –            “We really have no idea.”

Would the audience laugh? And if so, would they laugh at the bits they were supposed to laugh at, or at the travesty unfolding before them? Nor were jangling nerves soothed by a shocker of a technical rehearsal during which it became clear that we had created a show with more lighting and sound cues than an evening out with Jean Michel Jarre. When the first night audience was bid welcome to the “Dress Rehearsal” which later concluded with a bow taken to the strains of “The Great Escape” little did they know that we were not entirely joking.

Here are a couple of blasts from our past. Among the highlights of Last Tango in Powis was Oor Faither featuring Craig as God and John as a bloke in a hard hat. Another was what turned out to be the first of many times that we met Archie & Davie.

And here’s the programme, featuring original cast member Scott Christie on the cover.

Reviews were mixed. Well, we got two, and one was a stinker.

“Laddish, lacking in subtlety and reliant on the pantomiming of bodily functions.” said the Evening Express in an uncharacteristically accurate piece of journalism.

“A banquet of belly-laughs…superbly performed…if you can get a ticket for it, you’ll be very lucky.” said the P&J, enthusiastically.

“When’s the next one?” said a gratifyingly large number of the audience.

And perhaps most importantly of all;

“You’ve haven’t lost money.” said the manager of the Lemon Tree.

So we partied, in the Mudd Club of all places, where Greg – not normally an energetic exponent of dance – gave an interpretation of “Brimful of Asha” so spirited that he broke the glasses of a startled bystander. Sorry Kenny.

 

Cast
Scott Christie
Shirley Cummings
John Hardie
Oli Knox
Fiona Lussier
Craig Pike
Dave Quaite

Written by
Greg Gordon
Andrew Brebner
Additional Material by
Grant Campbell
John Hardie
Ewan MacGillivray
Charles Sandison

Directed By
John Hardie

Sponsors
Jock’s Bar
Enterprise Oil
Marathon Oil U.K. Ltd
Raeburn Christie

What the Papers Said

Aberdeen Press & Journal, 20/2/98

‘The newly formed Flying Pig Productions is the only company with the foresight and the common decency to supply me with a ready made review in the back of their programme. “Every word was a gem”, it read, “it’s the order they were put in that worried me”. After laughing all the way through Flying Pigs’ first hilarious comedy revue, Last Tango In Powis, at the Lemon Tree Studio Theatre last night, I’m more than happy to agree with the first part of that quote. Written by Andrew Brebner and Greg Gordon, and directed by John Hardie, this show is precisely what happens when talent and material boil over during the preparation for the Aberdeen Students Charities Show. Not that Last Tango is a light snack of mouldy leftovers. Anything but, this show is a banquet of belly laughs that will leave you completely stuffed. Superbly performed by Scott Christie, Shirley Cummings, John Hardie, Oli Knox, Fiona Lussier, Craig Pike and Dave Quaite, Last Tango takes a swipe at everything from the legal profession to sleekit flatulence. But first and foremost, it is a North-east show and it doesn’t care who knows it. It runs until Saturday at The Lemon Tree and if you can get a ticket for it, you’ll be extremely lucky.’

 

Next show: Where Seagulls Dare – 1999

While employed as Chief Electrician at His Majesty’s Theatre, Aberdeen, Kelvin moonlighted as Lighting Designer for Flying Pig Productions at The Lemon Tree. This involved sitting in the dark for many hours, occasionally feeling John Hardie’s light touch upon his shoulder as he softly whispered gentle words of encouragement in his lilting Doric brogue. Leaving HMT and going freelance, Kelvin soon found himself working on a variety of much-lauded Lloyd Webber and ‘Cammie Mack’ productions, but after a visiting a number of international airports and five-star hotels, he soon discovered that these extravaganzas of music and light were a poor substitute for the understated artistic splendour of Flying Pig.

Realising that nothing could compare, Kelvin left the theatre world to run the UK’s scientific diving programme in the Antarctic, and now runs his own company, Silvertip Expedition & Diving Management.

Cold weather survival gear buffs will be eager to learn that Kelvin is wearing an Interspiro AGA Divator Mk II Full Face Mask with customised Swedish DYK visor-mounted LP bailout block.