This week’s column is here.

The archive of previous ones is here.

STW? were (and are) a huge influence on me. One of the strongest memories of my childhood is of listening to their records over and over again; listening to the words of the sketches, obviously, but listening too to the laugh, that joyful, addictive sound that would rise up, peak and then, just as it was abating, suddenly peak again. I used to sit and wonder what expression or piece of onstage business had caused the laugh to rise again? And (as I imagined form the records, and subsequently saw in the flesh at His Majesty’s Theatre) Steve really could work a laugh, taking it to new heights with a word or a gesture, riding it to the maximum extent of the audience’s enjoyment and then coming back in again with the next line at just the right time.

I grew up speaking Doric (or at least “Doric-lite”) at home, but not outside it. The idea that the language of my parents and grandparents was something to cherish and celebrate in writing might never have occurred to me without Steve, Buff and George. The idea that they might hear something I had written and actually find it worth listening to was beyond all imagining; but as loyal supporters of the Student Show which spawned them, they did hear my material (and that of many other writers besides) and were scrupulous in seeking us out. I first met Steve in 1994 in the Stalls Bar of his Majesty’s Theatre when I was one of a group of writers ushered towards him after he had offered his congratulations to the performers and then asked “But who wrote this? Who wrote it? The writers are always forgotten.” I was fortunate enough to meet him many more times besides, usually after a Student Show or a Flying Pig production. “Never meet your heroes” be damned, he was an absolute gent, always unstinting with his encouragement. There could be the occasional criticism, too: he had an intense dislike of vulgarity in comedy and would soon tell you if he thought you had cheapened yourself (“You don’t need it, you don’t need it.”) But it was always with the best of intentions, and with the knowledge that times were changing: what was right for him was not necessarily right for the whole audience. His views were offered not forcefully, but for whatever they were worth; usually, a great deal.

One evening I will cherish is the night I fell in with him on the way up the road from a Society of Advocates in Aberdeen dinner. At the time, he had a house in the country and an Aberdeen flat in Sillerton House, the former boarding house of Robert Gordon’s College. Steve was not a Gordons Boy but an alumnus of Aberdeen Grammar School, and the idea of having a toe-hold in the territory of the “enemy” tickled him. It was he who was responsible for hanging picturesque views of the Grammar School in the communal parts of the building. He invited me in for a dram, which turned into several, and we blethered into the early hours. Steve’s main theme was how fortunate he had been: to be a solicitor at a period of time when a man of such moderate talent could be successful (he was far too modest); to find such gifted friends and collaborators as Buff and George; to have received the rave review at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe that had brought them such acclaim; and to have such a wonderful wife and family. But then, we were all very fortunate to have known such a good, kind and encouraging man, and to have enjoyed (and still to have to enjoy) the body of work that he leaves for us.

He was a great performer, a great writer and a great man. He will be sorely missed.

Listen very carefully, I shall say this only eence – Aberdeen’s Flying Pigs delivered laughs in spades during their latest Doric comedy offering, Silence of the Bams.

Fit iver ye dae ower the next dizen days, mak sure ye ging tae His Majesty’s Theatre and tak’ in een o’ their shows and ye’ll nae be dissapinted.

The four piece Buckie Drifters provided a strong opening to the show led by Craig Pike. This is quickly followed by the exasperated Mr Duguid, brilliantly portrayed by Greg Gordon, who try as he might could not get anyone at the end of a phone to pronounce his name correctly.

No Flying Pigs show would be complete without the banter between favourite skiving workers Archie and Davie as they put the world to rights. And who needs Elton John when Hilton John is on our doorstep extolling the virtues o’ Rubislaw Den far ye can bide in a hoose that has a lavvie wi’ a door?

Craig Pike excelled himself as Faither, dreading the arrival of nightmare couple and pair o’grips Selma and Eddie who arrived complete with a bottle of tattie brandy.

The Mieklewartle Television sketch featured farming characters Jock and Jim waxing lyrical about their state of the art tractor which runs on North-East sharn is an absolute must for any Flying Pigs’ show – as was the Doric skit revealing the truth behind those lonely hearts columns.

Steve Rance’s hilarious parody on Union Terrace Gardens was superb and really struck a nerve with the audience, while John Hardie excelled as new character The Lurker who happens to be very choosy about who he approaches in men’s toilets.

The air stewards sketch featuring Greg, this time joined by Moray Barber, had everyone in stitches as the retired trawlermen talked everyone through the Doric version of the safety drill – advising everyone to keep their own set of teeth as they would come in handy for identification purposes later on.

Well done Flying Pigs and their superb back-up team of talented writers for another gem of a show.

Evening Express 11/10/2011

‘A…gem of a show’ – Evening Express

‘Another hilarious romp’ – The List

We were back at His Majesty’s Theatre Aberdeen with a new live show from October 12th to 22nd.

We enjoyed it fine, as did several thousand ither folk, thank god.

The HMT website allows theatre goers to post their own reviews of the shows they’ve seen, and that’s where, if you click on ‘reviews’  you’ll find these kind words left by satisfied punters.

More info about the show coming soon, meanwhile there are some details about our preparations, and some rehearsal photos here, a preview piece in the P&J here and the full text of the Evening Express review here (they liked it).

Previous show: How to Look Good Glaikit – 2009

Our new 2011 stage show had it’s premier at an oot ‘o toon preview on Sunday the 11th of September at the Townhall, Inverurie.

We performed ‘The Silence of the Bams’ for the first time, a month before the start of our two week run at HMT, Aberdeen, with all profits from the performance going to the Friends of Insch Hospital & Community.

The Friends were established in 1988 to promote, provide or assist by voluntary and financial means anything which improves the standard and quality of care or environment of patients of Insch Hospital, Community and Health Centre; supplementing the service provided by Grampian NHS Trust.

The big project today is to raise funds to build a Health Hub immediately in front of the present War Memorial Hospital. This will assure the continuation of the services available at present, and add further services to benefit patients in the future.

It’s a great local cause, and the Friends are an extremely able and dedicated group. We’re very pleased to have been able to assist, and it was great to see that the show was sold out.

In fact, we were told that it was ‘mair than sold oot’, which was great for the charity, but less so for the fire safety officer.

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Day One: Monday, 05 April

Filming begins; 15 of the finest film and TV technicians in the country, and us. What must they be thinking? We’re off to a cracking start at 7 am on a gye mauchie day in Inverurie with Susan, Craig and Elaine up first in the shop. First item is in the can by 10:30 and the crew seems pretty happy with what they’ve got. The TV incarnation of Susan’s character ‘Donna’ looks uncannily like Amy Winehouse. Later action has Greg wrestling the Mitchell’s dairy coo across the High street, to the bemusement of passersby. We spent the remainder of the day pretending to be primary school children. Lots of laughs as we get to know the crew, many of whom are fresh from filming the latest series of ‘Taggart’ including Karen (make-up designer, mutilations and cadavers a specialty) for whom Greg’s grazed knee for ‘Mrs. Valentine’ does not present too big a challenge.

Quote of the Day: Faye (1st Asst Dir)

‘…Cut! Can we reset Steven’s bottom, please?’

Day Two: Tuesday, 06 April

On location in Old Aberdeen, another 7:00 am call for Greg and Susan. Shooting schedule is knocked for six when a great muckle removals van arrives at the location an hour early. Out on to the High Street for Robbie Shepherd’s ‘Fit Ye Sayin’ Til’t?’. Only gaggles of cagouled tourists, the surprisingly frequent number 20 bus and traditional Aiberdeen pishing rain to contend with there. 3 more items in the can, and we break for lunch. Great soup courtesy of ‘The Inn at The Park’ (Other hotels are available, but we can’t guarantee the quality of their soup). In the afternoon Elaine takes over from Susan in the Caledonia Bank call centre, John gets some tattoos and Greg gets his chest shaved in preparation for the ‘Personal Trainer’ sketch, much to Susan’s barely concealed delight.

Quote of the day: Eleanor (Director)

“Can I get the art department to confirm the position of Greg’s    electrodes, please?”

Day Three: Wednesday, 07 April

We’re doon on Doonie’s Fairm for Mtv (Meiklewartle Television) and the ‘Haud ‘is’ video shoot for their biggest hit, ‘Auchnagatt For Good’.
Today’s guest star was McGinty the Ram, the James Earl Jones of sheep, whose personal attributes drew the attention of Eleanor, our director (a close second for quote of the day: “Ivan, make sure you get his danglers!”). Then Susan gave the Haud ‘is boys the nasal equivalent of colonic irrigation as they expressed their love of rural Aberdeenshire through the medium of interpretive dance. All that remains is for Karen (Make Up Designer) to apply Greg’s Willie Miller moustache at lightening speed before Mr Duguid is ready for his close up.

Quote of the day: Joy (Costume Asst)

“You are to be congratulated on your turds.”

Emer (Prod Designer)

“Thank you. I made them last night, in my bedroom.”

Day Four: Thursday, 08 April

A hairy kind of a day today, starting with Greg’s aural and olfactory orifices and Elaine’s decollage. Karen (Make Up Designer) and Lynne (Wardrobe Mistress) brilliantly turn everyone into their own parents for Eddie’s Woes, but the morning shoot over runs, and the price is paid at the end of the day when we run out of time, light and Craig when filming The Liar. It would be a pity if Susan had been shot repeatedly with ping-pong balls for no good reason. Hero of the day is Moray, whose painstaking efforts to strain soup and barbecue sauce through his RAF moustache proved, ultimately, futile. An honourable mention goes to Jim (props master) who squeezes his size 10s into Maurice’s size 8 golf shoes for the filming of the golf shots, undaunted by the fact that he’s the only person on set (or, possibly, earth) with less golfing experience than John.

Quote of the day: Faye (1st Asst Dir)

“Now we need the close up on Elaine, licking the biscuit. Thank you.”

Day Five: Friday, 09 April

Back in Old Aberdeen today for Man’s Man, which requires the Machar Bar to be set dressed to make it look ‘more like a pub.’ Archie and Davie and Bob Spence; plus a couple of quickies and a great load of little wee fickery bitties. Happily, last night ended well with Jim (props-master) completing all the golf shots in one take, thanks to the tactical masterstroke of deploying ‘beginner’s luck’. The end is in sight; just one last push… and we’re wrapped!

Quote of the day: Faye (1st Asst Dir)

“Eleanor, you are now asking for jam”.

Listen to our audio clips here and see our video clips here.

Find more stuff to listen to on the History pages, where we’ve included one or two sketches from each of our stage shows going all the way back to our first ever production.

If you want to hear more, you can get a CD from our Shoppie.

‘Never short of gags or imagination.’

— P&J

‘Bristles with imagination and originality.. another winner from the Flying Pigs.’

— Evening Express

Pausing briefly to get married (Greg & Susan), move house (John), move to Glasgow (Steve), and, somewhat inconveniently, emigrate to Australia (Oli & Chrissy), the time was right for Flying Pig to return with an all new production.

Replacing Oli was no mean task, but as luck would have it, Moray Barber, experienced performer and long time friend of the Pigs, had returned from his years of exile in deepest darkest Edinburgh, and was quickly recruited.

Returning to the Lemon Tree for what was to be the last time, we made, for the first time, full use of video projection to stage Robbie Shepherd’s attempt to better David Blaine’s feats of endurance, relate the untold story of Jimi Shand’s psychedelic adventures in 60s London, and to allow Oli to continue to play Ronnie in spite of being on the far side of the world. We also saw the return of the Liar after a two year break and the creation of our political heavyweights, the Licensing Board.

Cast
John Hardie
Moray Barber
Craig Pike
Susan Gordon
Steve Rance
Elaine Clark
Greg Gordon
With
Andrew Brebner

Script
Greg Gordon
Andrew Brebner
Lyrics
John Hardie
Andrew Brebner

Directed by
John Hardie
Musical Arrangements
Steve Rance
Craig Pike

Sponsors
Ledingham Chalmers
CMS Cameron MCKenna

Previous show: The Madness Of Kingswells – 2002

Next Show: Best Back – 2004

‘The Best of Flying Pigs does everything it says on the packet. If you can beg, borrow or steal a ticket, do so. Your sense of humour depends on it.’

— Evening Express

An invitation to perform at HMT’s temporary venue at Hilton led to Best Back, our second outing of 2004 and our second ‘Best Of’ production.

Opening announcement: “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, this is Flying Pig Productions. Welcome to ‘Best Back’, oor ‘best of’ compilation. So if ye think this is bad, you should’ve seen the dirt we left oot!”

Initial concerns that our fanbase might balk at being asked to again fork out their hard-earned cash to see material which they now seemed to know better than us proved to be ill founded; enough of you wanted the proverbial another chance to see The Mither! Wedding saga, The Buckie Drifters, Ghengis Khanna and The Liar; Mother Theresa to enable us to sell out our first great muckle venue. Even a couple if feet of snow couldn’t deter the diehards, and as we gathered at Greg and Susan’s for the traditional wine and stovies, we were all agreed that the concussion suffered by one of our number inadvertently head-butting an opening car boot while loading props out of the theatre was a small price to pay for another successful show.

Cast
John Hardie
Moray Barber
Craig Pike
Susan Gordon
Steve Rance
Elaine Clark
Greg Gordon
With
Andrew Brebner

Script
Greg Gordon
Andrew Brebner
Lyrics
John Hardie
Andrew Brebner

Directed by
John Hardie
Musical Arrangements
Steve Rance
Craig Pike

What the Papers Said
Aberdeen Evening Express

In just six years, the Flying Pig has travelled from its launch pad at Aberdeen’s Lemon Tree to the stage of Her Majesty’s Theatre, earning itself a good few air miles – and a theatre full of fans – in the process. This latest show reminds us of their journey so far, presenting the eight talented comedy actors who started out in Student Show and now find themselves perfectly at home on the stage of the city’s largest theatre, where it looks as though they might be tempted to stay. As a “Best Of” show, theatregoers will have seen some of the material before, but predictable it certainly is not, as you reacquaint yourself with such classics as Mither and Archie and Davie, and laugh all over again at the hilarious lines you certainly won’t remember from last time. Characters retired a few shows back make a welcome return – The Liar, Oor Faither, Ghengis Khanna and the boys from The Cruel Sea provide some side-splitting moments, while rewritten lyrics for some of the best-known pop songs vary the pace and become classics in themselves. The Best of Flying Pig does everything it says on the packet. If you can beg, borrow or steal a ticket, do so. Your sense of humour depends on it.

Previous show: The Hunchback of Walker Dam – 2004

Next Show: The Seagull Has Landed – 2005